consuming fire.

Never before like this, felt so low, so worthless
Never before like this, ineffectual , dependent on charity.
Yet never before do I feel such ache, so deep, so complete
Yet never before do I feel such defeat, so utter, so tattered.

Sleep poisoned with shards of memories, cutting at every corner
Dreams shattered day by day, resurrected upon death
Slumber disturbed by deaden futility, knowing the end is neigh
Awakeness stabbed by harsh realities, expectations nulled by resignation

Blades of despair razing across the heart, cutting and slicing unmerciless
Brands of contempt burn unrelentless, charring all remains of hope
Visions clouded by dripping blood and smoking flesh, slowly ebbing with life
Future enveloped in dismal past, all chartered paths forgone.

Every word a brand on the mind; every slight a gouge at afestered wounds
Every hurt one grown upon others; every minute closer to death
Death of heart, death of feeling, death of spirit life receding
Darth of former joy, darth of former hope, darth of former choice now recoiling

In glossamered gloom I thrive and subsist, amidst glorious blooms do I silently weep
Recoiling from warmth I huddled in chill, amongst sweetened airs do I quietly choke
No expectation, no deliverance, no chance of matching, no chance of catching
Priced beyond ability, restricted by wrong currency, bartering unwanted things; foolishness.

Consuming fires, please come my way. Burn away all the torment and pain.
Consuming fires, please let me stay. Rebuild, restore my derelict brain
Consuming fires, please forgive my ways. Redeemed that I am, yet worthless still I am.
Consuming fires, please balm my wounds. Reasoned that I am, treason my heart still intends.

A rave of words, a mosaic of pain.
Shout unheard, in the recesses of my brain.
A ravage of all senses, a tearing of the heart.
Screams unsounded, from the sundering of my heart.